Failing to choose A is choosing B. Delaying the decision doesn’t change the options. You must choose.

CHOOSING A GUARDIAN FOR YOUR KIDS

Married couples should answer these questions separately and make a decision separately. If you have trouble coming up with an answer, answer those you can and set a specific date and time deadline for the others. ONLY NAME ONE MEMBER OF A COUPLE AS GUARDIAN - the one you would prefer if the couple divorced. But do keep in mind that the spouse of your Guardian will be deeply involved. Be sure to name an alternate - maybe the other spouse, maybe not. It goes without saying that your children’s relationship with the Guardian is foundational to this decision.

If spouses do not make the same choice, discuss the reasons for your choices – you must come to an agreement.

FIRST - Using the attached score sheet, score each of your options on a scale of 1-10 for each of the following questions.

Question #1 - IS IT LIKELY THAT THEY WILL OUTLIVE YOU?
Your parents are probably not a good choice. Even if they outlive you, the possibility of your children losing a second set of parents is too high.

Question #2 - HOW IS THEIR HEALTH?
Energy level can be important when raising active children. Think beyond the requirements to be a babysitter. You are appointing these people as parents.

Question #3 - IF THEY HAVE CHILDREN OF THEIR OWN, HOW ARE THEY DOING?
What would their family be like after adding your kids? If they don’t have children, what evidence do you have that they would be good parents?

Question #4 - WILL YOU BE ABLE TO PROVIDE FINANCIALLY FOR YOUR CHILDREN AFTER YOUR DEATH?
If not, will the Guardian be able to afford your kids? Consider naming a different person to be your Successor Trustee to avoid the danger of the Guardian squandering your money or yielding to your children’s manipulation. Have you considered life insurance?

Question #5 - DO THEY HAVE TIME TO RAISE YOUR KIDS?
Is one of them a stay-at-home parent or do they both work? Is the one that stays home the one you want to be your kids’ primary caregiver?

Question #6 - WHAT ARE THEIR VIEWS ON EDUCATION AND RELIGION?
Are you O.K. with those views? Do you expect the Guardian to raise your children with values that contradict the Guardian’s own values?

Question #7 - WHERE DO THEY LIVE?
Moving to a distant location can magnify the trauma your children will naturally suffer after losing their parents. If there is no other choice, discuss with the Guardian the need for sensitivity to this issue. Perhaps they could arrange for a period of transition.

As you consider these questions, look for those who score well generally. A great score on one or two questions does not compensate for low scores on the others. Once you have agreed, talk to your choice and ask them to take time to consider the decision.
Keep in mind that you can change your mind at any time. As the Guardian’s situation changes, they may become less desirable or someone else may become more desirable. Make the decision which is best for your kids.